What did you think of HBO’S Game of Thrones Season 4, Episode 8 (entitled The Mountain and the Viper)? Personally, I think this episode should have been named“The One in Which You Spend Most of Your Time Waiting for the End, Three Minutes of Shits and Giggles and One Loooong Minute of ‘Oh SHIIIIIIIIITTTTT!’” But I guess that’s a bit unwieldy, isn’t it?
This is how it all unfurled:
Gilly (Hannah Murray) is working for a group of the ugliest, meanest whores imaginable. But that’s okay because it’s not long before the wildlings descend on Mole’s Town and kill everyone in sight. Except Gilly and her baby are safe because they hide just in the knick of time. So when Ygritte (Rose Leslie) finds them she goes all ‘babes before hoes‘ and lets them be.
Oh course, Samwell Tarly (John Bradley) doesn’t know this and is all sookey lala while Jon Snow (Kit Harrington) and the others on the Wall chat about how screwed they are.
Next we are regaled with stories of Daenerys (Emilia Clarke) andMeereen. Firstly, we come across anunsullied (Grey Worm, played byJacob Anderson) perving on Missandei (Nathalie Emmanuel). This leads to many awkward moments (both onscreen and off) when we get to ponder the implications of sex when half of the bits are actually missing…
Then Ser Friendzone Jorah (Iain Glen) gets shelved altogether when the beans gets spilled to Dany about the fact the Jorah was nothing but a big fat spy. Poor guy just can’t seem to get a break.
While we are desperately waiting for the title match between Oberyn (Pedro Pascal) and the Mountain (Hafthor Julius Bjornsson), HBO makes us suffer through a meandering trek into every corner ofWesteros. As a result, Theon Greyjoy (Alfie Allen)gets to play himself and take over Moat Cailin. Thanks to this, Ramsay (Iwan Rheon) goes from being a Snow to a Bolton. Wonder if this means Ramsay can shake that monkey off his back and stop being such a demented fuck, or will having a real surname just give him a reason to continue being a mean little shit?
Arya (Maisie Williams) and the Hound (Rory McCann) finally reach a destination: the Eyrie. Of course, being Game of Thrones, they arrive just that little too late for Arya to be taken underAunt Lysa’s (Kate Dickie) wing.
But Sansa (Sophie Turner) is finally copping it on the chin and learning how to play the game. At first it seems she is going to dob Littlefinger (Aidan Gillen) in, but it turns out to be a case of ‘better the devil you know‘.
Can anyone say Stockholm Syndrome?
As a result, it now seems to be their mission in life to introduce Robin (Lino Facioli) to the outside world. And was it just me, or did Sansa dye her hair right at the end there? If this is the case, is she trying to pretend to be her Aunt Lysa? At least to the outside world anyway?
And finally that glorious part of the hour arrives: Tyrion’s (Peter Dinklange) Trial by Combat. For the last two weeks I have been imagining a world where Oberyn beats the shit out of the Hound and
Cuntface Cersei (Lena Headey) has to suck it up like a good little bitch.
And that’s what I got… kind of. For a short while anyway…
But before that fight, there is one of my favourite scenes so far in Season 4 of Game of Thrones: the conversation between Tyrion and his brother Jaime (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) about their simpleton cousin who liked to kill beetles. Seriously, I could have watched them chat all night long!
And then it was fight time.
Watching Oberyn move was fantastic. Seeing him taunt the Mountain was gold because we all know that someone who fights out of anger is a dead man walking. Oberyn does a great job, eventually slashes the Mountain’s Achilles tendon and then stabbing him while he is down.
He really should have stopped there. He should have slit that man’s throat and basked in the glory that would follow.
Instead, he forgot to follow his own advice.
Rather than finish the Mountain off, he wanted revenge. His anger rose up and swallowed him whole with his wanting for admittance of the Mountain’s past deeds.
So, as a result, he got his head crushed in by the Mountain.
And Tyrion is now the dead man walking…
I hate you Game of Thrones.
You can read my Episode 9 recap here.
Want to check out how awesome Oberyn’s funeral would be if Pedro Pascal got to plan it? Then this is the video for you:
Here is the preview video for HBO’s Game of Thrones Season 4, Episode 9 (entitled The Watchers on the Wall):
Sources: Vanity Fair – Game of Thrones Recap, Season 4, Episode 8: “The Mountain and the Viper”
YouTube -Game of Thrones 4×09 Promo |1| “The Watchers on the Wall” (HD)
(Photo Credits HBO Inc.)